Doug’s Mouthpiece - Droug.co.uk

A diet for the self employed seo’s

If you are in the seo game then you know that you are probably a fat seo and so are all your sad seo friends. If you are not into seo and have a life then please help your seo friends to stop eating and drinking.

I will explain the normal seo’s day and you will see the problems:

• 00.00 Arrive back from pub and have a spliff
• 00.30 Feel hungry and wonder what to do. Logon to the internet and sit down with Mars Bar, bag of crisps and pint of water….they think the water makes up for the beer.
• 02:00 Goto bed
• 08:30 Wake up, rush into spare room in dirty underpants and logon to check rankings and stats
• 10:00 Realise have not eaten, so have coffee and toast and cold pizza from last night, infront of the screen
• 13:00 Feel hungry and thirsty, got to local chip shop and bring home fish and chips with a litre of coke. Eat in front of the screen
• 15:00 Cup of coffee in front of screen with 5 chocolate biscuits.
• 17:00 Cheese sandwich in front of screen
• 19:00 Small bottle of coke infront of screen
• 20:00 Feel like have been anti social so decide to ring round none seo friends.
• 20:30 Meet none seo friends in pub and bore them talking about seo.
  • Drink 3-10 pints of fizzy lager, with couple of bags of crisps
• 11:00 Curry or kebab on the way home
• 00:00 Arrive back from pub and have a spliff
• REPEAT

Please help

Doug running and eating vegetables

Interesting stuff written by Doug Scott